THE DAILY MALE - continues...20/06/08

Before I know it, I’m running a bubble bath, lighting candles, opening a bottle of Cava (I'm not wasting Champagne on him!) and selecting the appropriate music.

Drunk and disorderly, we both get naked and slide into the warm womb of water where we slither all over each other like a merman and his maid.

Despite his shortish stature - no more than 5’9” - Eurotrash is sporting an impressive organ which pokes up out of the water like a 'peniscope'. The invitation is irresistible and I lower my head and sink my mouth around it. He groans appreciatively and massages my feet.

We soap each other's bodies and talk and laugh and it feels like someone has changed my batteries. Normal service has been resumed.

We get out of the bath and step naked onto my little balcony. The night is mild and heady and he wraps his arms around me and pulls me back against him, attempting to enter me from behind.

I’m not that drunk and there’s no way we’re having full penetrative unsafe sex. I don’t trust him. I also have no idea where he’s been and, more to the point, I remind myself that I am trying to stay faithful. To what, or more precisely, to whom, is debatable.

Eurotrash doesn’t insist, so we lie down on the bed and just fool around. When he leaves, we’re still laughing. No mental anguish is involved, no demands, no commitment. We arrange for him to come over again some time and he promises to cook me a 'fat, juicy steak'. I am disproportionately excited about this.

Friday. Despite the brilliant fun I had last night which certainly helped to blow the cobwebs away, I still haven’t heard a dickie bird from You Know Who. Brad Pity ups the ante by bringing our date forward to tonight. I weaken to the point of horizontal by inviting him to come straight over without bothering with the ‘drink at the Elgin’ first. Well we have met and I know what I'm dealing with.

My attempt to have a zipless fuck fails. Guilt and remorse and nostalgia make uncomfortable bedfellows. CC said he couldn’t have sex without love and although I can and often do, it happens that I rather wouldn’t.